What is prayer?

Example #1: Volunteers were given scrambled sentences and one group was given a group of scrambled sentences that were about rudeness and the other group was given a group of scrambled sentences about being patient.  The group that had just found the words relating to rudeness were much more likely to interrupt the interviewer’s phone conversation.  Very interesting.

Example #2: The other example they did is they had again 2 groups but this time one group got scrambled sentences with words to be found about being old and the other group had random words.  These two groups of participants were then timed from when they left the office, where the testing was done till they reach the elevator and they found that there is a significant slower pace to the group of people that were finding the words that were related to being old elderly.

Example #3: One group was asked to think of a very smart person and then answer trivial pursuit type questions vs. another group that was asked to think of a very stupid person and then answer the same trivial pursuit type questions.  The group thinking of the smart person did better at answering the trivial pursuit questions!

Example #4:  Finally the last example is from the tipping point by Malcolm Gladwell and in this book he discusses a very interesting story regarding the good Samaritan.   Princeton University psychologist met with a group of seminarians people studying to become a pastor’s and they were trying to answer the question who would stop and help a person who is slumped in the alley head down, eyes closed coughing and groaning.  One group was told that they were late to the class that they were going to teach and they are expected in only a few minutes so they better get moving quickly.  The other group were told that they have enough time to get over to the classroom.  What they found was that on several occasions the seminary students going to give their lecture which was actually on the parable of the good Samaritan literally stepped over the mock victim as he hurried on his way.  What they say is of the group that was in a rush 10% stopped to help, but of the group that was not in a rush that had some time to spare 63% stopped and helped.  This study suggests that the convictions of your heart and the actual contents of your thoughts are less important in the end in guiding one’s actions than the immediate context of your behavior.

All of these studies suggest that we as individuals must be very cognizant of the world around us and to influence it in a positive way, to show a good character,  we must be aware of our surroundings and slow down.  Those with truly great character do the right thing no matter if they are late for a meeting nor are they influenced in a negative way by their surroundings.

There is a GREAT marriage and relationship book titled: Love and
Respect. The premise of this book is simply: “…each individual
among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife
must see to it that she respects her husband.”-Ephesians 5:33

It is very interesting that the author of this letter, Paul, doesn’t
ask the wife to ‘love’ the husband. Men, in general, feel loved by
being respected. We all want to be loved. We all want to hear the
words: ‘I love you.’ But men in particular need to hear that they are
valued. Most men would prefer to hear the words: ‘You are my hero.’
Strange as this may seem, I have seen this truth played out in my own
life and in the lives of the vast majority of men.

It is important for ALL of us to feel valued, to be respected. It is
important to treat each other and our patients with R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

• They spend a lot of time focusing on positive moments
• They spend a lot of time focusing on keeping passion alive
• They spend a lot of time focusing on keeping a positive attitude

These are ancient principles.  The research points out that it is not about the negative or bad times, and it is not even about how we deal with those negative or bad times.  It is ALL about looking at the good, being grateful, counting blessings, quality time, communication, and celebrating life’s positives every chance we get.

“Numerous studies show that intimate relationships, such as marriages, are the single most important source of life satisfaction. Although most couples enter these relationships with the best of intentions, many break up or stay together but languish. Yet some do stay happily married and thrive. What is their secret?

“A few clues emerge from the latest research in the nascent field of positive psychology. Founded in 1998 by psychologist Martin E. P. Seligman of the University of Pennsylvania, this discipline includes research into positive emotions, human strengths and what is meaningful in life. In the past few years positive psychology researchers have discovered that thriving couples accentuate the positive in life more than those who stay together unhappily or split do. They not only cope well during hardship but also celebrate the happy moments and work to build more bright points into their lives.

“It turns out that how couples handle good news may matter even more to their relationship than their ability to support each other under difficult circumstances. Happy pairs also individually experience a higher ratio of upbeat emotions to negative ones than people in unsuccessful liasions do. Certain tactics can boost this ratio and thus help to strengthen connections with others. Another ingredient for relationship success: cultivating passion. Learning to become devoted to your significant other in a healthy way can lead to a more satisfying union.

“Until recently, studies largely centered on how romantic partners respond to each other’s misfortunes and on how couples manage negative emotions such as jealousy and anger – an approach in line with psychology’s traditional focus on alleviating deficits. One key to successful bonds, the studies indicated, is believing that your partner will be there for you when things go wrong. Then, in 2004, psychologist Shelly L. Gable, currently at the University of California, Santa Barbara, and her colleagues found that romantic couples share positive events with each other surprisingly often, leading the scientists to surmise that a partner’s behavior also matters when things are going well.

“In a study published in 2006 Gable and her coworkers videotaped dating men and women in the laboratory while the subjects took turns discussing a positive and negative event. After each conversation, members of each pair rated how ‘responded to’ – how understood, validated and cared for – they felt by their partner. Meanwhile observers rated the responses on how active-constructive (engaged and supportive ) they were – as indicated by intense listening, positive comments and questions, and the like. Low ratings reflected a more passive, generic response such as ‘That’s nice, honey.’ Separately, the couples evaluated their commitment to and satisfaction with the relationship.

“The researchers found that when a partner proffered a supportive response to cheerful statements, the ‘responded to’ ratings were higher than they were after a sympathetic response to negative news, suggesting that how partners reply to good news may be a stronger determinant of relationship health than their reaction to unfortunate incidents. The reason for this finding, Gable surmises, may be that fixing a problem or dealing with a disappointment – though important for a relationship – may not make a couple feel joy, the currency of a happy pairing.”

Suzann Pileggi, “The Happy Couple,” Scientific American Mind, Jan/Feb 2010, pp. 34-36.

Sally Beth Roe, a character in Piercing the Darkness by Frank Peretti, becomes a Christian, but Peretti provides us with a glimpse of what is occurring in heaven during the very moment that Sally Roe becomes a Christian.  It is a remarkable moment of angels celebrating and the lamb of God embracing her.  We have NO idea.

“Above, as if another sun had just risen, the darkness opened, and pure, white rays broke through the treetops, flooding Sally Beth Roe with a heavenly light, shining through to her heart, her innermost spirit, obscuring her form with a blinding fire of holiness.  Slowly, without sensation, without sound, she settled forward, her face to the ground, her spirit awash with the presence of God…All around her, like spokes of a wondrous wheel, like beams of light emanating from a sun, angelic blades lay flat upon the ground, their tips turned toward her, their handles extending outward, held in the strong fists of hundreds of noble warriors who knelt in perfect, concentric circles of glory, light, and worship, their heads to the ground, their wings stretching skyward like a flourishing, animated garden of flames.  They were silent, their hearts filled with holy dread…As in countless times past, in countless places, with marvelous, inscrutable wonder, the Lamb of God stood among them, the Word of God, and more:  the final Word, the end of all discussion and challenge, the Creator and the Truth that holds all creation together–most wondrous of all, and most inscrutable of all, the Savior, a title the angels would always behold and marvel about, but which only mankind could know and understand.  He had come to be the Savior of this woman.  He knew her by name; and speaking her name, He touched her.  And her sins were gone…”-pg 321, Piercing the Darkness by Peretti

Edwin Abbot in his book Flatland shares with us, through parable, mathematics, and physics, the very real possibility of dimensions and realities so very close to us, but we remain unaware of them.  What if string theory is true?  What if there are dimensions just beyond our reach?  What if God and the heavenly realm is all around us, surrounding us, embracing us?

What would it be like to get a glimpse into heaven uninhibited, over joyed, overwhelmed in celebration?  Here is a brief video of a wedding that brought laughter and joy to my heart as I imagined….dancing and rejoicing in heaven over US!

I started the New Year resolved to read through the Bible (again).  As I read Matthew chapter 5, I was struck (again and again) by its beauty and transforming power.  On the same day, I just happen to pick up A.W. Tozer’s book: The Pursuit of God that I have been reading for months and turn to chapter 9 which starts with a discussion of the beginning of Matthew chapter 5–’coincidence’? Unlikely.

Tozer points out that most of what constitutes evil, pain, and suffering in our world comes from you know who….you and me!

“In the world of men we find nothing approaching the virtues of which Jesus spoke in the opening words of the famous Sermon on the Mount. Instead of poverty of spirit we find the rankest kind of pride; instead of mourners we find pleasure seekers; instead of meekness, arrogance; instead of hunger after righteousness we hear men saying, `I am rich and increased with goods and have need of nothing’; instead of mercy we find cruelty; instead of purity of heart, corrupt imaginings; instead of peacemakers we find men quarrelsome and resentful; instead of rejoicing in mistreatment we find them fighting back with every weapon at their command…these are the evils which make life the bitter struggle it is for all of us. All our heartaches and a great many of our physical ills spring directly out of our sins. Pride, arrogance, resentfulness, evil imaginings, malice, greed: these are the sources of more human pain than all the diseases that ever afflicted mortal flesh.”

His words are oxygen to a patient gasping for air.  Christ alone knows how to ease our suffering, our pain, our burdens…

“Into a world like this the sound of Jesus’ words comes wonderful and strange, a visitation from above. It is well that He spoke, for no one else could have done it as well; and it is good that we listen. His words are the essence of truth. He is not offering an opinion; Jesus never uttered opinions. He never guessed; He knew, and He knows.”

“`Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.’ (Mat 11:28-30) Here we have two things standing in contrast to each other, a burden and a rest. The burden is not a local one, peculiar to those first hearers, but one which is borne by the whole human race. It consists not of political oppression or poverty or hard work. It is far deeper than that. It is felt by the rich as well as the poor for it is something from which wealth and idleness can never deliver us. The burden borne by mankind is a heavy and a crushing thing. The word Jesus used means a load carried or toil borne to the point of exhaustion. Rest is simply release from that burden. It is not something we do, it is what comes to us when we cease to do. His own meekness, that is the rest.”

In coming posts we will examine our burdens…

• The 10 commandments are for our benefit.  God wants us to know as Christians the path that will benefit us.
• Coveting leads to jealousy which is a painful dead end
• Life is unfair sometimes
• Be grateful for what you have
• YOU are enough!

Chapter 11 of Ruthless Trust by Brennan Manning is a life changing concept and chapter.  The chapter is titled: The Geography of Nowhere.  The concept is simple.  If we are NOT NOW HERE then we are NO WHERE!  So lesson #1 is to live in the NOW.  Don’t worry about the future or the past.  Live in the Now Here.

 “The music of what is happening,” said great Fionn, “that is the finest music in the world.” …The music of what is happening can be heard only in the present moment, right now, right here.  Now/here spells now-here.  To be fully present to whoever or whatever is immediately before us is to pitch a tent in the wilderness of Now-here.  It is an act of radical trust-trust that God can be encountered at no other time and in no other place in the present moment.  Being fully present in the now is perhaps the premier skill of the spiritual life.”-Chapter 11, Ruthless Trust by Manning